Tyler Durden talks about how to help your wingmen for the good of all, and particularly when and when not to give advice.
Researchers have found that males’ testosterone levels are effected even by trivial events such as their favourite sports team winning or losing a game. Our testosterone varies depending on the level of success that we have.
Mystery calls this MOMENTUM.
Our state DRASTICALLY affects our ability to pickup girls. They pickup on it.
When I’m in a good state, I can perform at elite levels. On some *rare* occassions I’ve seen my game run even as tight as Mystery’s.
I’ll feel great, practically invincible. Cocky as ever, I feel like I can pickup any chick in the club – and I CAN.
I CAN THINK OF ALL THE *RIGHT* THINGS TO SAY. ROUTINES AND LINES ARE FLOWING OUT OF MY MOUTH EFFORTLESSLY. I AM FUNNY, SHARP, COCKY, AND ITS ALL EFFORTLESS. I AM *ON*.
Other nights, I cannot initiate a chat to save my life. SERIOUSLY, I CANNOT INITIATE A CHAT. No exaggeration. I’ll try, but I’ll be snubbed over and over.
Literally, no exaggeration. I get sub-AFC. This happens to me at least one out of every 5-6 times that I’ll go out.
So what causes this???
It has to do with how ALPHA you feel at the time, and the BIOFEEDBACK that you get as a result.
WHEN YOUR WING’S GAME BREAKS DOWN – PROCEDURES:
In the past, when my wingman’s game had broken down, I’d stop and start running strategy and criticism on why it has occured. Try to get to the bottom of it, etc etc.
This has NEVER been helpful, and has always just made things WORSE. It never got good results.
What I’ve figured out now, is that GIVING ADVICE is OUT-ALPHAING your wingman.
By taking your advice, your wingman is BETA-ing himself.
Doing this in PICKUP is CATEGORICALLY DIFFERENT than in tasks such as academic work, because ALPHA STATE will DICTATE RESULTS.
In academic work, for example, you can take advice from someone, and it will improve your final draft.
However, during pickup, as you take advice, you feel beta-ed, and your results become WORSE and WORSE.
Again – taking advice during ANY other activity is EFFECTIVE, because the advice is HELPFUL.
Because the MERE ACT OF TAKING ADVICE makes you feel beta, it is UNHELPFUL. Therefore you must always AVOID giving advice to your wingman IN FIELD, and SAVE it for a post-game DEBRIEF.
It is my opinion that STRATEGY SHOULD NOT BE DISCUSSED WHILE IN THE MIDST OF PLAYING THE GAME, and should be saved for a post game debrief.
When your wingman’s game breaks down, the KEY is to AVOID talking about pickup. Realize that the SMALL AMOUNT of strategy that you can discuss will NOT change your wingman’s game enough in such a short period of time to effect substantial change in his game. The SOLUTION is to TAKE A BREATHER, and just go play pool or go outside for a bite to eat or something. JOKE AROUND.Do NOT address that his night is going poorly. AVOID it.If he asks why, just say “dude, you’re MONEY.. those chicks were defective anti-social.. do you wanna go find some NORMAL SOCIABLE CHICKS?” and then let HIM direct you back in.
LET YOUR WINGMAN TAKE CHARGE of the situation, so that he can RETURN to alpha-state.
Do NOT start offering advice, or you will BETA his state.
Do NOT tell him about all the chicks you are picking up.
Just joke around, and put him into a situation that will BOOST his state / elevate his testosterone / *whatever*.
**Get him to TAKE CHARGE in a way that is SUBTLE, so he doesn’t know that you are deliberately patronizing him.
If you can prod him to do something that makes him feel alpha, he will return to alpha-state, and again become a helpful and effective wingman.
This is important of course, for 2sets and just because in general, your wingman should be social-proofing you. An ideal pair of wingmen don’t cockfarm eachother out. They BENEFIT and SOCIAL PROOF eachother, because they are BOTH cool guys.
A tactic that helps with this is:
When my wingman comes in, I give him the BEST introduction possible.
“Guys guys! This is Twentysix! This is the COOLEST MUTHAFUCKA on the ENTIRE PLANET.. If you talk to this guy for even 30 seconds, you will clearly see that he is the coolest fucking guy”
Then update him on what you’ve been chatting the chicks about, so he can throw in his 2c.
This also sets the frame that you are more into your wing than the chicks. “Bros before hoes” mentality. Makes you seem cooler and thus more attractive to the set.
Alpha heirarchy bullshit will dictate whether or not you pull the FINEST girls on any given night.
Take for example the parties that I’ll attend. On nights when I am the coolest guy in the room, I have FULL ATTENTION, and I am the ANCHOR of the conversations. (as discussed in the post below this one).
On such a night, I WILL pull the hottest girls, or at very least have all of the attention and IOIs.
However, if a cooler/more alpha guy shows up, I will NOT have good results. I’ll probably go home with nothing, or scraps.
More on wingman tactics:
I’ve noticed that when I have a newbie with me, I’ll usually TAKE CHARGE. I am the man. I go into sets WITHOUT THINKING. I AM ALPHA.
However, when I have an equally skilled PUA with me, I sometimes think more about results. I think too much. Will I get snubbed? Will this work? etc etc…
With a new guy, I don’t have TIME to think about this stuff. I have to TAKE CHARGE of the situation.
I feel ALPHA, and chicks PICKUP on it. I have an excellent night.