How To Disarm Last Minute Resistance


1. Steal her frame: If you think she’s getting worried, stop BEFORE HER, and say things like, “You know, I’m getting the feeling that we should pause for a moment and talk” or comment on how it’s all going so fast for you.

2. The classic, that is in all the recent lay reports: Keep agreeing, but moving forward and pacing. “You’re right, I shouldn’t be unbuttoning your pants right now” “Its so bad I’m making you feel so good”

3. Riker’s Three Rules (do you use these? do you have a good script for them?)

4. Mystery turn-off: In bed, if she won’t let you do something twice, respond casually-without anger. Turn on light, turn off music, watch a cartoon. If she asks what’s up, say, “Ever since I was a kid, the idea of ‘no’ has been the biggest turn-off. I just lose everthing. It’s really no problem-we can just be friends. I don’t want to.” If you want, you can tell a story here about how in sixth grade a friend taught you a trick, and you went to a girl in class and said, “I bet I can make your breats move without touching them.” Then you bobbled them, and said “I lose.” You got into such big trouble, the principle even hit you and then suspeneded you and called your parents. So you really respect boundaries now, and when a girl says no, you assume that she means no, and just shut down. It’s no big deal. That’s just the way you are.

Now, after this, either she will come to you and reinitiate or you can come to her. Try even being direct: if, for example, she won’t take off her shirt, say, “Get onyour knees…lift your arms” and just take off her shirt

If you get rejection a second time, say, “I’m an adult—either we’re going to be happy, maybe even have sex, or we can play chess.” It is scary to do this, but at least in America, I’ve never found it not to work. Try experimenting by just turning off and rolling over when you get resistance, you’ll see that she will return to you.

5. I HAVE NOT USED THIS ONE YET. IT IS NEW. FROM CLIFF’S FRIEND DAVID.  BUT IT IS ALSO GENIUS. Early in the relationship,he asks the HB about what her rules are, he gets her to ratify that she is spontaneous, that she follows her feelings, etc. He is laying traps so that if she resists later, she is then in the position of contradicting what she has already told you. Then, when facing LMR, he will say, “Excuse me, I didn’t get a copy.” HB: What? PUA: A copy of your rules. Fax them to me and I’ll decide if I want to see you again.” Then you trigger the traps you have set: “I thought you were spontaneous. I thought you did what you wanted. Were you lying to me?” Other traps involve getting her to ratify that she’s her own indpendent person, and not dependent on family and friends for decisions, and that you won’t judge each other by past experiences with anyone else.

Yes, they want sex with you. But, you have to first take care of that internal anti-slut defense voice they have. So you develop a pretext that they can use to convince that anti-slut voice that it’s okay.

Make a list of your PRETEXTS. Then seed them into the conversation early, before she’s DDB. That way, it seems only natural to go back to your place to HEAR THAT CD or BORROW THAT BOOK or GET THAT TAROT READING or PLAY WITH YOUR KITTENS or SMOKE THAT PCP or whatever you’ve got going on…

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