I’ve had a stunning realization. In the last week and a half, I’ve taken to three new women’s bedrooms, culminating with a true 10 last night, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever had.
It made me realize that there’s two kinds of resistance you’ll see in the bedroom that can be overcome:
She likes sex, but has reservations about you. She likes you, but has reservations about sex.
If she likes sex, but isn’t sure about you, you’re suffering from a lack of attraction. This is what typical LMR stuff on ASF is built around. You turn away from her, punish her, make her chase you for other reasons, and otherwise try to amp attraction up.
You shouldn’t be running into this kind of LMR when you’re operating at a higher level. In fact, at the highest level, you’re MUCH more likely to be running into the second kind of LMR: She likes you, but has reservations about sex.
This is where she really feels you, and likes you, but is afraid sex with you could have some negative repercussions. Either because you’re a playboy and you’ll be out the door as soon as you’re done, or she doesn’t want to feel like a slut, or scare you off or otherwise lose you.
With this, it’s much better to be gently persistent, along with gradual and very rewarding. If you take a girl that’s really into you and make sex a huge deal with a theatrical performance in bed involving backturns and punishment, you’ll damage her AND give her power of you in the form of sex. Sex with a girl who likes you should be a mutually rewarding thing, that you gently lead her towards. You’re the man, so you lead, and that’s why you’re leading. You reassure her about any hangups she has, and keep things moving for a pleasurable time for both of you.
My last 3 new girls:
NO LMR: Almost two weeks ago, Woodhaven and I get girls. Woodhaven fucks my girl’s friend. My girl likes me, and enjoys sex. She’s had some sex before, is comfortable with it, and isn’t afraid of it. She doesn’t have any hangups about me or sex.
When it comes time to get down to business, no problem: No LMR. She has no hangups about me or sex.
HANGUP ABOUT ME: I was taking a call outside my friend’s apartment on a cell phone about a week ago. A Latin girl wearing a leopard spotted short dress and high heels (or is it cheetah? I can’t ever keep ’em straight) walks by. She was looking hot, I told her so. I ran into her later in the same building, and after a few minutes of conversation, I go up to her place with her.
I see she has the complete series of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on DVD. I say we ought to watch one, we get in bed, watch the show (first time seeing it, it was okay) and cuddle up. Afterwards we start to get it on some, but I run into LMR. This girl *loves* sex and it’s obvious: She’s a dancer and was actually heading out to dance when I first saw her earlier in the evening. She’s got a dancer’s body too.
I keep going, persisting, and eventually fingering her. Her pussy is very nice and symmetrical, and smells wonderful, so I actually go down on her (rarely do this on a first meeting, but I wanted to). I was unable to fuck her that night, though, and on a subsequent visit, I ran into a similar performance.
The reason wasn’t a hangup about sex: This girl was very sexual in all ways. It was that she didn’t know me very well, at all. She wasn’t sure if I was the right guy for her and so on. Though I could’ve likely gotten some conciliatory head, I passed on it, and unfortunately wasn’t able to finish what I started later.
The mistake I made, in retrospect, was assuming she wasn’t necessarily into having sex. See, when I run into LMR, 90% of the time or more these days, it’s because the girls think I’m a playboy or have some other ideas or reservations about sex holding them back. This girl was definitely down for rocking the bed, but wasn’t sure if I was the kind of guy she’d take. In this case, reassurance-based stuff wasn’t the right way to go.
HANGUP ABOUT SEX: A true 10, by God, the kind I see about once a season. Korean, this time, and taller than me in her Gucci six inch stilettos.
From the start, I play it cool. I get her number fairly quickly because I was late to a play I wanted to see. After that, I talk to her on the phone a couple times, hang out with her for one hour once, talk on the phone once or twice quickly, go out for four to six hours in a really fun, long day that we kissed at the end of, talked once more shortly, then I went over to her place and cooked dinner with her.
She lives in a small apartment with another Asian girl, and her roommate left after I showed up to give us some time to herself. I greet her at the door with a peck on the lips, then we cooked pasta together. I chopped up vegetables while she stirred the meat sauce we were making. We’ve got an incredible connection, and we really, really like each other.
After dinner, she says, “You like fruit?” I was about to say no, because I was full from our excellent cooking, when she says she’s going to get us strawberries.
She cuts a bunch of strawberries in half, and cuddles up to me, taking two small bites of a strawberry before feeding the rest to me. We kiss a few times as she feeds me like a King, and then we kiss passionately. I take her to her bedroom and we start up.
She’s really nervous, repeatedly saying she’s shy. “Honey, I’m shy” and “Honey, I’m nervous” she’d say. I kept reassuring her. “Baby, it’s okay. We’re just going to spend some time together.” “It’s okay, baby, you’re so beautiful, you don’t need to be shy.” And so on.
She had no hangups with me: She was really feeling me, maybe even thinking I’d be the next man she’d love. But she had some hangups about sex.
With that, it’s time to reassure her that I like her, I’m going to be with her, and emphasize the strong connection we feel. This is the exact opposite route you want to take with a party girl on a one night stand: You don’t want her thinking you’re going to mess her regular life up if she just wants to get down once and never see you again.
But I was gentle and caring, and slowly took my girl and I to new heights. We didn’t have long to have sex since her roommate was coming home at some point, but it was amazing none the less. She came a couple times, I really enjoyed it, and we held each other afterwards. I then drank some water and we went for a walk before I kissed her goodnight and headed on my way.
If I’d punished her for being nervous or shy, I’d have broken our connection down. Much-hyped ASF stuff like backturns and freezeouts in the bedroom would’ve set a horrible tone for the relationship that’s to come between us. If the girl is really feeling you, you won’t need to punish her or convince her to sleep with you. You just need to give her a comfortable way to sleep with you.
Remember that you’re attractive and you’re strong. When you play cool, natural game, you don’t need a production in the bedroom: Just gently lead her and take her to new heights of pleasure.